I knew I wanted to write you a letter for your second birthday for some time now, but I’ve struggled with what to write. Should I give you some worldly wisdom? Should I tell you how much I love you? Do I recap the last 2 years as your mom? As I’m writing this, I’m still not sure what route my letter is going to take. But here goes…
I know you’ve been through some big changes lately and it can be a lot for your growing brain to take in. Sometimes you get frustrated or maybe even a little bit jealous. That cozy place on my lap or in my arms was solely yours just a few months ago. I want you to know that even though you have to share me with your baby brother now, you’ll always be my first baby. You and you alone guided me into motherhood. You were my first pregnancy, my first belly flutters, my first baby bump, my first delivery, the first baby I kissed on the forehead that was MINE. No matter how many brothers or sisters you have, you will always be my first. And there’s an extra special place in my heart for you, always.
Right now you are super excited about doing your business on the potty. You have no idea how proud I am of you for this big step. Sometimes, I am so tired I forget to clap and cheer for you, but just know that your tiny self amazes me. You pick up on things so fast.
You’ve known how to say “I love you” for some time now, but this past week you started to connect what those words actually mean. A few days ago, you hugged your brother and said it twice. Lincoln is your best friend, and you are such a super big brother. Treasure your relationship with him always. Protect him, include him, stand up for him, and love him like you do now. Some day, your relationship with your brother will be the most important one. Just like my relationship with Auntie Tiffany. There is no love like the love of your siblings.
You are your daddy – in both looks and personality. But every once in a while, I see a little bit of myself in you. Art, music, and cooking are in your blood (in addition to building, athleticism, putting things together, and figuring out how things work.) I am so curious to see what interests and paths you will take as you grow.
If I’m to be honest, I am a little scared for you to grow up in today’s world. Since birth, you’ve been a blank slate – absorbing things as you go. I hope instead of the ugly, you will add to the light and good in the world, as I know you will. Every day, when I go to sleep, I question if I’ve done a good job at showing you as much light, love and happiness as I can. But I know I can only shelter you for so long. No matter what, always look for that light – in yourself and in others. Do everything in your power to add to it. Be kind. Work hard. Open doors. Say thank you. Give hugs. Smile.
You are my light, my happy place. And I love you so much. You are my sunshine.